On my own again...

Good morning peeps! It's Saturday, October 15th, and what an eventful week. My divorce papers were filed Monday, the refinance of the house was Tuesday and my new vinyl plank floors were delivered this morning. In my attempt to do shit on my own, I signed up for Beer and Donuts through the Columbus Craft Beer Alliance without Chuck. My goal was to come to an event I'm interested in to meet other people that are also interested in the same things. Turns out only couples are attending so I'm enjoying my beer and donuts solo which is fine.
I'm trying to do more on my own so it isn't always Chuck and Randi. For those that have gotten out of long term relationships, this should sound familiar. We are both working towards separation while remaining good friends. I'm excited and scared to be divorced, D Day is December 22nd.
I am nearly through with Herceptin, only two more infusions! I am looking forward to no longer planning a visit to the infusion center every three weeks. It's hard to believe it was a year ago this past Wednesday when I was diagnosed. So much has happened in the past year. I still have hot flashes and am on a higher dose of Effexor to combat them. I have crazy hair, it's short but puffy in the middle. I might need to get a trim...
I am starting to feel more normal but I still mention my cancer about once a week. I think it will be awhile before it isn't at the forefront of my thoughts. I attended a conference this week and it was nice not to be bald or newly diagnosed like last year. Although everyone I meet is always super supportive and nice, it's good to just be Randi.
Chuck is ready to date, and I'm happy for him, he deserves someone that makes him happy. I'm not ready, no idea when I will be, but I'll just trust my instincts and go with the flow. I feel like I have so much baggage that I just don't want to talk about. Trust is hard to offer, it feels like a daunting task to actually find someone to talk to especially when you're aware that there's a lot to say. A lot to discuss. A lot of judgment that could be involved. Just not in the mood.
For New Years Eve, I was planning to see my BFF in Florida but the flight cost was too much so Chuck suggested a party at the house. Originally, I really didn't want to ring in the new year with my ex husband, but where else would I be? Particularly if our friends are able to come over. These new floors should be enjoyed by everyone!
As usual, I'm taking it one minute at a time, one day, one week.